""To thine own self be true""

"To thine own self be true." How often have we heard this famous Shakespearean quotation? Did we ever stop and think about it for a moment- probably not.

In modern vernacular this advice would be rephrased as- "trust yourself." This is particularly good advice when many of us our overwhelmed with our everyday activities and responsibilities. On any day or night of the week we turn our televisions on and we are bombarded with all kinds of so called experts telling us how to run our lives, what to do, how to react to certain situations, what is the right and wrong kind of behavior etc, implying that we have very little trust in our own instincts and decisions.

M.J. Ryan, author of: Trusting Yourself: How to Stop Feeling Overwhelmed and Live More Happily with Less Effort is a consultant with Professional Thinking Partners, where she is involved with coaching executives on issues of life purpose and leadership. It is her contention that the principal reason why we seem helpless in the face of all of these demands on ourselves is that "we don't trust in our capacity to deal with life as it comes to us, so we are in a perpetual state of fear and worry."

Ryan focuses her book on three important emotional elements and spiritual qualities that shape self-trust- self-awareness, self- acceptance, and self-reliance. She builds a compelling case as to why these factors are important in helping us lead a more productive satisfying life, and the ultimate benefits that will result when we commit ourselves to the process of trusting ourselves.

Dividing the book into six sections with a brief bibliography, the author examines the power, gifts, attitudes, and practices of self- trust, and she concludes with fifteen simple ways to increase your trust in yourself and the journey to wholeness. As an example of some of the sub-topics, readers are counseled as to how to cultivate thinking habits, how to ignore the "they" syndrome (what will they think about my actions), examining what worked before, realizing that you are the expert you are searching for, and endeavoring not to be the be-all and end all person, not to take life personally.

Although the book is a great teacher, what I found to be a major shortcoming was its redundancy of variations on the same theme. I also found an over tendency to constantly use enumerable quotations from various sources that at times became annoying. Nonetheless, for those who lack self-trust, the sound advice tendered and the self- realization of the tools you have within you will no doubt prove to be very beneficial in your future endeavors.

Reviewed by Norman Goldman
Courtesy Bookpleasures
Posted August 11, 2004

Summary

In an age of constant media messages and so-called expert advice telling us to be richer, thinner, smarter, and faster, we're all dogged by worry and self-doubt. Life coach M. J. Ryan believes we've become so dependent on "experts" that we've forgotten how to trust ourselves. In her new book, Ryan finds the answer to feeling swept away by life: understanding that we already have what it takes to cope and learning how to tap into the wisdom inside us. In Trusting Yourself, M. J. Ryan shows that the long- forgotten virtue of self-trust, like patience and "an attitude of gratitude," can help us live more happily and successfully. In short, beautifully crafted chapters, Ryan teaches us how to stop looking at what is wrong with us and start learning what's right. From making more confident decisions to expressing our unique talents to feeling more optimistic, the joys of self-trust are many. A celebration of an untapped source of personal power, Trusting Yourself helps us find saner, more peaceful lives every day.