""My real family really loves me. My TV family doesn't really love me but it is good at faking it.""

"My real family really loves me. My TV family doesn't really love me but it is good at faking it. My real family is always there for me. My TV family is only there for me Monday through Thursday for twenty-six weeks a year. Or until cancellation."

These are some of Patricia Heaton's candid observations from her book Motherhood and Hollywood: How To Get A Job Like Mine pertaining to her life as a mother and actress.

For those of you who are unaware who Heaton is don't fret; you may be in good company. After she won the Emmy for leading actress in a comedy series in 2000 and in 2001 for her role as Raymond's wife, Debra, in Everybody Loves Raymond, Heaton was introduced to an agent from her agency at the big Emmy party. She recounts that after hearing her name, the agent said, "And what do you do?" So much for fame!

Heaton admits in the introduction that she has very little writing experience. However, although the book will probably not qualify for any literary awards, it nevertheless is entertaining and somewhat witty, especially for fans who enjoy watching the fictional Debra every week. In fact, there seems to be a constant nagging in the back of your mind, is Debra really Heaton?

Some of her riveting comments pertaining to her relationship with her husband and the various tales concerning her children seem to mirror some of the episodes of the television series.

Many books of a similar genre written by actors and actresses would be better off if they were privately published for friends and family, as they are mainly of interest to them. However, the same cannot be attributed to Heaton's book, particularly if you are interested in knowing what makes her tick and her views on motherhood. The reader feels as if they have been invited over for dinner at a friend's home.

It is a conversation that probably many of us have encountered that runs the gamut from schooling for our children, marital relations, honesty, integrity, religion, and how are you going to pay the bills and feed your family. What distinguishes this friend from others is that she is a successful unpretentious actress. Nonetheless, this does not seem to affect her sincerity and candidness. As Heaton says, so what, I am a successful actress for now, however, at the end of the day "all we can be sure about is that we love one another and that we've tried our best that day to show it. All the other stuff, all our best-laid plans, have no guarantees, as we were all reminded on September 11.

Reviewed by Norman Goldman
Posted December 2, 2002

Summary

"The really important things in life are your family and friends. And what will people say about you at your funeral— that you won an Emmy once, or that you were a good person, kind and generous? Well, as for me, I hope it's the latter. And the fact that I recently commissioned an Emmy-shaped coffin just eliminates the need for anyone to bring it up."

Everybody knows that Patricia Heaton plays the hilarious, wise, and tempestuous married-with-kids everywoman on Everybody Loves Raymond. What they might not know is that in real life she is married, has four boys under eight years old, and is just as funny offscreen as on.

Motherhood and Hollywood is Patricia Heaton's humorous and poignant collection of essays on life, love, marriage, child-rearing, show business, having parents, being a parent, spousal rage, surviving fame, success, and the shame of underarm flab. She is warm, witty, and refreshingly irreverent.

Heaton grew up in suburban Cleveland, one of five children of devout Roman Catholic parents. Her father was a noted sportswriter for The Plain Dealer; her mother died suddenly and unexpectedly when Heaton was twelve. Love, fast food, and an unflagging sense of humor held the clan together and propelled Patricia on a showbiz career that began with hilariously nightmarish struggles in New York, eventually leading to a triumphant move to Los Angeles.

In Motherhood and Hollywood, Patricia Heaton pours out her heart and minces no words. She's taking all prisoners for cookies and a glass of Jack Daniel's and diet ginger ale. Laughter ensues.